are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
