We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize