was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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