grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
