He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
