she woke up with a sticky ear
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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