she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
