i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize