i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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