508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize