It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
