BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
