what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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