just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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