What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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