He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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