i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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