airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
