I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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