I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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