I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize
