Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
this will be a night to untag.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
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