before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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