They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
