if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
