Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I need to stop coming to work sober
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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