I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize