I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
