i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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