the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
did you just send me my own nude
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
