i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
it glows. i had to have it.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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