So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
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