I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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