I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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