You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
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Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
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We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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