Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
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