I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
