My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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