All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
operation have a gay friend backfired
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
