I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
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