Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
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