wat bout pragnant strippers??
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
