If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
And then he peed in my hair
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
