she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
