I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
