I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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