he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
