I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
