No awkward lesbian experiences without me
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
