she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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