I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
