so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
