I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.