How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
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...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
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i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.