I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize