Are we in a gay sports bar?
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
the liver wants what the liver wants
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
